That Time I Miss Crackers


Let me explain.

My dad is in the cracker industry.  He’s the guy who installs and works the ovens that bake crackers.  All.  Over.  The World. As a result, I have always had an unlimited supply of crackers at my disposal.    It has been my go to meal when I have been lazy – especially when I have smoked Gouda *drools*, or tuna, or sausage, or when I have a tummy ache (crackers are great for an upset stomach), or that amazing spicy fromage from Trader’s Point Creamery:


mmmm…..I always took Crackers for granted.  You don’t realize it until you move to a country where I don’t even know if there is a German word for Cracker…..or if there is, it is very rarely used.  This is mostly because Germans love them some fresh baked bread and pretzels.  I don’t blame them….it’s good stuff.

But I still have a jonesing for my crackers.

This is one of the things they don’t tell you when you become an expat: when you do come a crossed a little something from home, you will be on it like a hobo on a ham sandwich.  Also, those little somethings from home will also be fucking expensive.

Edeka Ritz Crackers

I was very excited to discover Ritz Crackers.  But I will be upfront about being ripped off.  This box calculates to about $2.00 for about 7 ounces of crackers.  At Walmart:

Walmart Ritz Crackers

You get almost double the crackers for about $0.50 more! Oh and they are not stacked nicely like the boxes back home – they have thrown into a bag all willy nilly where a good number of them are broken :-/ Not cool, Ritz, not cool.

But you can bet your bottom dollar that I buy a box every time….because it is still cheaper than a plane ride (or even for delivery from Amazon – must look into that).  I actually have to buy two because T has discovered that loves Ritz’s buttery goodness.  Once he gets wind of a box being somewhere in the apartment, he proceeds to eat them mercilessly like it’s his job.  Thus I need a box for my own addiction.

This doesn’t just happen in Germany.  In certain stores back in Indiana, we can buy the top selling soft drink of Peru: Inca Cola.


Oh yes, it’s really that color.

In the states, you can find this delightful beverage, but it’s more expensive than your average Coke. But we pay it because it’s a little taste of Peru and we can get it.  We know it, the store owner knows it so here we are.

It’s the same with my crackers….or any other item that hints of my homeland.

Fortunately, living in Germany means that I actually have access to these food items from home.  I have read horror stories from other expats living in more remote places (like South Korea) where small reminders of home are more scarce and hella more expensive.  So I am not complaining too hard – but it is an observation.

So if anyone wants to send me care packages you know crackers need to be on the list… many of possible (or maybe I will just hide them from T), along with Reese’s, Pop-Tarts, Girl Scout Cookies (Tagalongs to be precise), Cheez-Its, and Spicy Nacho Doritos……

Don’t worry, I will add more to the list.

In the meantime, I will be drowning myself in amazing European Chocolates 🙂

Bis Freitag!

2 thoughts on “That Time I Miss Crackers

  1. This is so funny! My husband and I ate our last package of Jacob’s Cream Crackers during the last two days (we ration those babies like it’s wartime), and I was grumbling about how Germans suck at crackers. “Even the Ritz aren’t right!” I’m sure that’s partly due to the lack of stacked sleeves you mentioned – they go stale here within days. Granted, the bread and pretzels should make up for that and they nearly do. But we are seriously considering ordering some more cream crackers from and paying shipping besides. I go mad for those things.

    And Girl Scout cookies!! I forgot about Girl Scout cookies!! Penning note to mother: “Please buy 5 boxes of mint cookies; I’ll pick them up in June…!”

    1. Haha! The first time I opened a box of Ritz in Germany, I literally said outloud, “What is this shit?” They need to get their act together with the stacked sleeves.

      By the way, when getting a care package: what does your mother put on the customs form? Does she actually write food? Or Gift? We have had some weird experiences with the Deutsche Post so what do you recommend?

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